There’s just something magical about a day that
occurs only once every four years. It has a carpe diem feel
about it, as if the day is an extra gift to make something special
happen.
Unfortunately I got so wrapped up planning five years
into the future that I forgot to seize the day this Leap Year. Of
course, that hasn’t stopped me from evaluating the possibilities of
such a spectacular day and preparing for its next occurrence:
February 29, 2016. Four years from now—it’s just so optimistic
of me!
While pondering this weighty decision, I came up with
a few ideas for spending a day so spectacular it occurs only every
fourth year. Unfortunately, not all of them apply to me, but that of
course, won’t stop me from sharing them with you. You’re
welcome.
Tradition has it that this is the one day a year that
a woman can shake off the chains of tradition and propose to her man.
In this modern post-feminist era, this hardly seems remarkable. We
women don’t need a special day to make our own destinies. Every
day is ours for the taking!
Instead, I suggest that a clever man would seize this rare day for his proposal, or better yet, his wedding. Just think of it. That sly guy would only be required to remember the day’s significance every fourth year. Since many of us women tend to hold such anniversaries in high esteem, think of the back pain spared from sleeping in the dog house and the money saved from the roses of apology. And when that clever guy says, “This is our second anniversary, but it feels like eight looooooooong years,” his wife can’t possibly get upset, because it’s the truth. (And we all know that guys never, ever get in trouble for telling the truth.) By the time the seven year itch rolls around, that blissfully wedded couple will be too old to scratch it. It’s genius really. Don’t over-think it; just take my word for it. It’s genius.
Wedding bells not in your four year plan? Perhaps a legal birthday change is more your style. If your birthday were to fall on Leap Day, it seems rational that you only be required to age every fourth year. I’m pretty sure my grandma’s birthday falls on Leap Day. She looks 85, but she swears she’s only 29. I would suggest that you perhaps wait to change your birthday until you reach a disgraceful old age like, let’s say 35. After all, Grandma’s not fooling anyone with 29, but we all might agree to discreetly go along with 47.
Instead, I suggest that a clever man would seize this rare day for his proposal, or better yet, his wedding. Just think of it. That sly guy would only be required to remember the day’s significance every fourth year. Since many of us women tend to hold such anniversaries in high esteem, think of the back pain spared from sleeping in the dog house and the money saved from the roses of apology. And when that clever guy says, “This is our second anniversary, but it feels like eight looooooooong years,” his wife can’t possibly get upset, because it’s the truth. (And we all know that guys never, ever get in trouble for telling the truth.) By the time the seven year itch rolls around, that blissfully wedded couple will be too old to scratch it. It’s genius really. Don’t over-think it; just take my word for it. It’s genius.
Wedding bells not in your four year plan? Perhaps a legal birthday change is more your style. If your birthday were to fall on Leap Day, it seems rational that you only be required to age every fourth year. I’m pretty sure my grandma’s birthday falls on Leap Day. She looks 85, but she swears she’s only 29. I would suggest that you perhaps wait to change your birthday until you reach a disgraceful old age like, let’s say 35. After all, Grandma’s not fooling anyone with 29, but we all might agree to discreetly go along with 47.
Even though these both seem like really great options for February
29, 2016, they’re just not right for me. For one, I’m already
married AND past the seven year itch. As for the second-- well, no
one’s really going to buy 47 at 85. Sorry Grandma.
So how exactly can I make my next Leap Day special? Carpe diem is
so Dead Poets Society. I think I can do better than that.
I propose that February 29 be hereby declared International Day of
Rest. It’s not a day we usually have at our disposal for
productivity, so why waste it making things happen. We, as a planet,
should just be lazy. (S)leap over that extra day, if you will.
Everyone deserves a day off, at least once every four years. Thank
you, solar system!
As an example for all of mankind, next Leap Day, I will be taking
the day off. If that’s not special, then I don’t know what is.
Who’s with me?
Count me in!
ReplyDeleteI'm in!! Love the idea!!
ReplyDelete