Off Topic

I'm sick.  Be careful if you're reading this.  I fear it may be catching.

You see, I have fallen victim to the mind eating disease known as writer's block.  Either that, or I really just have nothing interesting to say.  Bare with me.  This gets better as it goes.

I spent most of last week trapped at home with Andrew who was having his time of the month-- his week of high fevers, that is. As much as I love cuddling with an electric blanket that kicks me in the face, after five days, I was all cuddled out.  And so was he.

I made the most of our couch time this week by catching up on the news.  Every month, for exactly three to six days, I am totally in the know on any subject covered by CNN.  Go ahead.  Ask me anything.  Conrad Murray-- probably guilty.  Herman Cain--  a presidential hopeful.  Nancy Grace-- still dancing with the stars.  It was a slow news week.

Sesame Street, on the other hand, was revealing a new letter every day.  They were all, "A is for apple," and Andrew and I were hanging on every muppet word as we waited to see if Elmo would learn how to wash his hands correctly.  It doesn't get more exciting than that-- when you're 19 months old.

As riveting as each episode was (twice a day), I would have spent that time surfing the web on my phone, except that our internet and phone went out for two days for the third time in two weeks.  If you're keeping track with the math at home, that's six days out of 14, people.  

And so I say, "Dear Mexico, we're a little too close to the U.S. to get internet service like west Africa. Air kisses with dirty looks,  Lisa."  That should do the trick.

Speaking of tricks, just as Andrew was beginning to feel better, Benjy came down with a mysterious sore throat virus keeping him home from school with a low grade fever.  It really wasn't too bad of a day, though, because Benjy is surprisingly sweet when he's delirious with fever.

He says things like:  "Mommy, I'm in love with you. (pause)  People that are Engwish is in love with you.  But people that are Spanish is not in love with you."  I would have to agree.  See the part about my internet and phone.  And isn't it kind of funny that Benjy's whole world is divided into those that speak English and those that don't.

And now that we're on the subject of Benjy, that kid is really confused.  He can't seem to figure out if he's from Mexico or Oakwood (the apartment complex where we lived last year).  That whole United States thing that we keep telling him he's from is just where they keep the "good" Wal-mart.

Which reminds me.  Saturday I escaped the house to do some shopping in the U.S. with Jacob, and we of course, ended up at Wal-mart.  And I don't care what anyone says about Target being competitive, you just can't find any good mullets or muumuus at Target.  

Anyway, Jacob and I were searching for Halloween inspiration for his costume, and somehow we stumbled into the ladies' underwear section, and I found these.

"Buty Pant.  Because sometimes you just need a buty."

I spent the rest of the evening trying to figure out who should get a pair for Christmas.  Because I'm a giver.  And no one should have to live without a "buty."